...Doing 5 beats a day for 3 summers...
That's how I feel.
Grind mode.
This week I felt extremely overwhelmed in the best way possible. I wasn't overwhelmed because I can't handle the projects I'm taking on, I'm overwhelmed that I'm getting projects that all fit in line with my career goals. It's just all happening at once and I couldn't be happier about it. These are called BLESSINGS.
Blessings on blessings on blessings.
I work roughly 60 some odd hours a week or more. But I'm not complaining. Here's the thing... sometimes you have to recharge. I felt terrible, I totally hyped my friends up yesterday like:
- "I wanna be Ratchet Ray tonight"
- "It's so nice, I'm off, it's Friday, let's turn up"
I even had the nerve to say:
- "Real talk we linking up or nah B"
Knowing good and damn well I was in my PJ's on my couch watching Viceland. Then it hit me. Ray you aren't going anywhere. I decided to wash dishes, start the grueling declutter process, and just rest. Like really rest.
I actually grappled with the idea of going out and turning up with the homies.
This morning as I type this bare faced, listening to Kanye West's entire catalogue, in a tank, sweats, and Nike slides I realize how happy I am to took care of me first.
I never really appreciated self care nor understood how important 'me time' is. I'm an extrovert so I'm always on the go and giving pieces of myself and after a while that gets exhausting. I didn't even make it on my computer, lol, I fell asleep on the couch, laptop on attempting to do my taxes. I didn't even get past the log in y'all.
I tried to hard to stay awake and finish watching Intervention but my body had other plans. I slept better last night than I ever have. Lately my sleep has been all over the place, I average like 5 hours of real sleep and with my lifestyle that's just not gonna cut it.
I am not Kevin Gates. I get tired.
I was asleep by 11:30pm, naturally! That's a feat for me, I'm not ashamed to say I take prescription sleep medicine and it has saved my life many tough weeks.
My point is...
Sleep, rest, recharge, take time to love you, there are 52 weekends in a year to live it up. Take a few to focus on yourself. These parties, people, events, whatever... it'll all be there.
No one, I mean NO ONE, will love you like you love you. So love you first!
Stay hungry my friends...
Young Ray
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