I don’t know how many times I thought about quitting AFewHungryGirls.
There were so many times I was just thought to myself, I’m done with it, it’s over.
I was high key worn out.
The turning point came when I realized why I was so burnt out. I was too busy trying to keep up with other bloggers (specifically foodblfoggers) and compared their success to my perceived lack of success. I took a long break and Lord knows I needed it and got back to basics. I realized 1. their journey was not the same as mine, nor was their motivation. 2. That I never started blogging in the first place to obtain success. In fact when I started I didn’t even know I could turn it into a business, I just wanted an excuse to post my food pics somewhere lol. 3. That this was my baby and my baby alone to blog aka TALK about what ever I wanted to and hopefully some people would read it and think ‘Hey, I’m just like her’!
When I decide to transition from a food blogger to a lifestyle blogger it was after a 4 month hiatus… possibly even more but I mean who’s counting.
I’ve been in and ultimately out of a relationship with the person I thought would be my husband - I needed to be single. I needed to be selfish. I needed to focus on myself and my personal happiness. I couldn’t do that focused on making someone else happy and completely forgetting about me. I’m soooo thankful for this mental growth. I’m still single and accepting shots if you want to shoot it. Be weary, I got those Lebron Iguodala blocks if you don’t come correct and understand I may just simply not like you romantically lol.
I’ve completely changed my career path. I went from being on track to apply for either a post grad BSN or PA program and specialize in orthopedics to owning a creative marketing agency full time. This was pretty touch to be honest, it all happened at once. I felt like I was giving up not only my relationship that I’d worked nearly 6 years on AND a career I devoted nearly the same amount of time and even more money to. But guess what y’all? I’m happy on this path. I do still miss putting on casts and frolicking in the OR with cute residents who had zero interest in me lol!
I cut the back of my hair off - I got an under shave and did something I said I’d never do…cut my hair! My hair and all it's glory is a journey I've been on for over 10 years and the struggle was and still is real. It’s funny I saw a meme today about how a woman who cuts her hair is about to embark on a new journey. I got the cleanest edge up yesterday morning y’all and I’m embarking on things I’ve never thought I’d ever do. But will I cut the rest? HELL TO THE NAW NAWWWWW.
I’m starting to rekindle my relationships with my family. I’ve never really been close to anyone in my family, I’m not sure why or how this happened but I know the only person I ever felt close to was a saint by the name of Sarah Helen Ball aka my granny. It’s crazy I still tear up thinking about her life and her death and if I make her proud. This week while in Atlanta… with family :)… I saw a picture of my grandfather and realized I’m not sure if I even remember his voice and it immediately brought me to tears. I started desperately trying to remember if we had pictures together or if my memories were the ones still in my heart. Then I thought about how all my grandparents are gone and it still makes me sad, there’s nothing like the love of a grandparent. With that being said I’ve vowed to at least shoot a text to say ‘hey, I love you’ to family. My parents, brother, cousins, aunts, and uncles I want them to know I love them.
I’m addressing my mental, emotional, and physical health. The heaviest I ever weighted was 190lbs and I was more of a mental wreck than anything else. I was so lonely y’all. I had friends, family, and even a doggy that loved me and I felt so alone. I felt like I wasn’t worth losing the weight, like I wasn’t worth being a better me. I’d settled in my depression. I sought help, but I wasn’t ready to accept it. In 2013 I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and it scared the shit out of me. I mean I knew I wasn’t going to die from it, but I also knew this was a life altering diagnosis. I ignored the signs, the symptoms, thought I was superwoman. Fibro was my crypotnite. It 100% affected my relationship, my mental awareness, and most importantly my quality of life. I’ve been on medication that made me gain weight, eat everything in sight, and even caused me to experience withdraw when I decided to stop taking it. By the way withdraw is an awful experience, if you know an addict please be sensitive of this when soliciting help and try to provide a well rounded recovery plan. In 2017 I’m now prescription medication free, I lost 30 lbs, gained 10 back cuz I wanted my booty lol! Yet I still experience pain on a weekly sometimes daily basis. Basically just bare with me, if I say I’m tired… this is why.
1. Did someone compliment you today?
2. Was a portion of a prayer answered?
3. Is your heart beating? Are you breathing?
4. Take that free cake, pizza slice, or even donut offered to you and cherish the moment savoring it. lol Don’t judge, good food releases endorphins :)
5. Do you have someone that loves you? Even if it’s your dog that only loves you because you give them food lol
6. ARE YOU ALIVE?
Thank you to every LAST person that has stuck by me on this journey called life. I appreciate and love you!
Stay hungry my friends…
Young Ray
